Bed of Laundry

And that exactly is what I'll be lying on tonight. Too tired and sleepy to fold the stuff. Who isn't after taking wooze-inducing anti-histamine pills and 2 liters of beer, the strong stuff. Can't help it, even when infinite-looping OMG by Usher featuring Will.I.Am.

Rainy Day and Monday; Pandanon and the Teeny Weeny

Well it is. And it really was. It is a rainy Monday and it was a teeny weeny. And I skipped work altogether.

But not because of yesterday's hopping activity. It was exhausting and boozy but fun and sunny. I slept around 8PM, that's practically noontime on my biological clock! Woke up at the break of dawn, 6AM, but obviously, I have more pressing matters to attend to today to be bothered with going to work.

Yesterday.

@ Mactan Waters

Our Bulgarian friends luuurrrve the sand and sea.

One guy had to borrow Giovanni's too-large board shorts because he wanted to swim but not in the birthday suit. He emerged from the boat's modesty nook (hiding place where one gets to dress undress etc) like he's from Hawaii wearing a flowery skirt. But as real men go, he was all male wearing it. He just had to tighten the cords so that he won't accidentally leave the shorts behind while wading through the waters.

@ Pandanon Island

We docked and got off Pandanon to spend the whole afternoon there. Miss V was like the sun goddess, all gorgeous and golden under the sun whole afternoon. People actually thought she was some sort of American celebrity.

But the waters were too shallow. And we couldn't risk swimming really far out in case the water gets suddenly too deep. So I just pretended to swim and drown by crouching and crawling around on the seabed.

And while a Japanese guy played around with his Pinay girlfriend, they made his penis come out, right in front of everyone. WTF! Sadly, it was too small and pathetic. I think it was embarassed, because it couldn't be bothered at all to look happy and energetic while it was being subjected to my judgemental views.

We almost ran out of booze, but for a scandalous price, we can have some men buy beer at the next island.

On the way back to mainland Mactan, most of us had one last dip in the deep blue. 

I just wish I could get that teeny weeny out of my head.

Twix and Overcast

Crap, it's raining. The sky is gray and overcast. I hope it's sunshiny over there in the islands while we hop around them. Good thing I miraculously discovered a Twix in my tiny refrigerator. I'm craving for one and voila! It's sooo like magic and christmas and sunshine and all. And off I go to hop hop hop.

So Many Things To Do, So Little Time

The queen of multi-tasking (a.k.a ME) is at it again. I'm reading no. 8 of Georgia's confessions while tending to the Gunpowder Cellar, my Cafe World joint, playing Governor of Poker and preparing stuff for tomorrow's outing. Oh, and I'm also blogging. And drinking Red Horse and eating Pringles. 

Ok. I should catch some zzzzzzzzzzs. I have to be bright and shiny by 6am.

Wearing Bunny Ears While Buying 54 Bottles of Beer

Went to SM to get more of those silly head bands that I lurrrve soo much. Wore the pink bunny ears one all arount town. A lot of abnormal people stared. IG-nored.

Kamai Kainan's beefsteak is soooo good. Tender, saucy and peppery. Yum yum yum.

New stuff on the racks that I just couldn't resist: Cheeto's Cheddar Jalapeno crunch thingy and Pringles Extreme in Blazin Buffalo Wing flavor.  Plus a 3-pack of my favorite Kinder Bueno and some Choco Knots. I lurrrve. And no, I'm not gonna eat everything tonight. Meaning, I'm all set for the rest of the June rainy days. Like an ant. And this ant is also craving for Twix.

Finally to Country Mall to horde on Supplies for Survival (a.k.a. booze) for tomorrow's big island hopping escapade. Big because our Bulgarian friends have never experience what it's like to hop around the islands. They're such a fun lot to be around. Can't wait to hop with them.

Insane Dancers

Dawn.

Insanity unleashed at the Penthouse. One guy has the craziest dance moves ever. I've met my match on the dance floor.

Moooning

Last night.

Funny conversations with the BG friends. One guy wants to go to Manila via boat. I told him if that's the case then I'll see him in a week.

And Then I Got Flowers. Among Others.

Yesterday.

The Bulgarian Colleagues were so sweet. The flowers were some of the most beautiful (literally) stuff I ever received. I've been staring at them. (the flowers, not the Bulgarians) They even started to sing Happy Birthday in Tagalog. (The Bulgarians, not the flowers) Hahahaha! I felt like a celebrity and also winner of a beauty pageant. And I wanted to have a group hug. But they might find it strange.

ohlala

Ramsie gave me one of my most favorite chocolates in the whole world, peppermint-filled Cadbury. I wasn't able to have lunch or breakfast so I stuffed it all in my face.

And I have to hand it to Ardie. He doesn't smoke at all but he managed to find me some Black Bats flavored with my favorites: Vanilla and Mint. It's like having a smoke whilst enjoying aromatherapy. Marlboro Red has definitely got some rivalry going on.

And Hazel brought me some cotton candy, yum yum yum. So sweet. The gifts and my close, close friends from the office.

Almost There In the State of Drunken Stupor.

If an apocalyptic flood would be like the birthday greetings you dumped on my wall and in my inboxes, it would result in good vibes all over the earth and will prolly cause world peace. If that’s the case, then it wouldn’t be called apocalyptic at all. I love you people for the non-memory gap state of mind regarding my birthday. I am drunk to the drunkest degree but I will never forget this. Coz I will just scroll down my wall tomorrow. And I guess it would be a “like a virgin” syndrome. (the bit where Madonna sings “touched for the very first time")  Hahahaha!  I have such a big smile that I could swallow my face. Let's celebrate! Let’s not wear underwears!!! Weeeee! :D

Birthday Bucket List

It's a free day, a free day, my birthday. I'm still too overwhelmed and sleepy to respond to the apocalyptic flood of birthday wishes on my inbox and FB wall. I love the people for not havin' memory gap about this. The day stretches ahead deliciously. And here is my itinerary:

1. Turn the AC back on and take a post-waking-up-nap.

2. Wake up again for the 2nd time this morning.

3. Dance! Dance! Dance!

4. Spiked Coffee and a marlboro.

5. Extra long shower with the works. (shampoo, condition, exfoliate, sing)

6. Brunch. Prolly left-over pizza.

7. Bit of shopping.

8. Dinner with the crazy family

9. Will enter and dwell for a while in the State of Drunken Stupor, a free country where one can do silly things such as modeling one's entire collection of silly hats and headbands while one is dancing and singing and maybe doing a declamation piece.

10. This is the part that I won't remember ever. C'elst la vie and Que Celes.

Oh, in between 5 and 6, I'm putting on clothes and doin' a bit of hair and make-up of course. I don't want to go out into the world out there naked and looking like a hag.

Adultery

It's official. I am now 21 years old and on the threshold of grown-uppy land, doing grown-uppy stuff and living the grown-uppy life. 3x a week at the most. :)

Happy birthday to me right now, with pizza and beer and the yummiest exclusive manwhore ever.

Ponderous

Just wonderin' why I'm blogging so much. Is it because of my impending birthday? Or because of my independence day, addiction to manual laundry and/or my obsession at tending to my apartment? Or is it because of the grown-up stuff that I possess due to a lot of grown-up stuff shopping that I've been doing lately? Or is it because of the unknowing generosity of my ISP? Or maybe it's because of the wings of freedom that is in store for every living thing in the universe? Aaaaaaah.

And that's the kind of wisdom brought about by 2 bottles of Strong Ice, 3 bottles of Super Dry, a pint of Red Horse and currently, creme de menthe and brandy. Presidents, Kings, Queens, Prime Ministers, Datus, Rajahs, etc should follow this regimen to gain insight on how to achieve world peace. Peace.

Mouthwatering Matter

Just had a fun dinner at Pizzeria Michael thingy somewhere and it took forever for stuff to be served. But all's well, since the staff was super-courteous, the food was great, I can be a laundry-service provider for a day and spend my earnings there and the beer tasted like any good ol' beer. Plus the mouthwatering matter is so near but cannot be grasped, which is fine because if I had grasped that mouthwatering matter and did erotic-ish stuff to it without its consent, I could be imprisoned for grave offenses.Right?

Let's Meet at Panty

A million things on my mind and then I organized a meeting through MS Outlook with location: Panty.

Monica was like "AHAHAHAHAAHAHAHHA!" and I was like "WHAT??? WHAT???" and then we're both like "HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"

Guess it's weird to discuss serious matters in a panty.

So. Since we're closing and all, the office couldn't be bothered with a conference room so we converted 3/4 of our pantry into an area for grown-up discussions, thus banning food and drinks in the now-business/nosebleed-like corner. 

It could be I'm out of sorts coz of the busyness of my professional being, or R on my lappy simply ignored my pressing press or it could be I have lesbo thoughts of panty because of the hottie. But I'm more attuned to the male hottie, so I would've typed under meeting location: boxers or briefs. If that's the case.

Building Inspector and Comb in the Cab plus Kegels

After having building/ sanitation-inspector duties for half-an-hour or so, I feel so jack-of-all-trades. I did a waitress-type stint last Saturday and since my independence day, I'm also sort of a domestic helper for myself. These are on top of the day job. But I don't want to be a building/ sanitation inspector. The risk of roach attack is too great. 

Anyhoo, in the cab on my way to the office. The driver had bangs-like mustache and glossy hair carefully parted at the side. He kept combing it very carefully with a little comb. Like every two seconds. WTF. Hahahahaha! I gave him a 5-peso tip for entertainment factor.

I love Figaro's tuna melt, thanks to Monica for the heads-up. It's so healthy and mustardeee. I could eat this for breakfast, lunch, and dinner and wouldn't feel guilty downing a million bottles of beer.

If that's the case then I wouldn't bother with her stomach suction tip to attain the nirvana of teeny waistline.

Guess I'll be sticking to Kegel exercises. Now, that's a pleasant kind of suction.

Timely or Untimely and Laundry

It's practically midnight! And I'm wandering around the apartment drinking water and peeing and listening to the neighbor warming up his ten-wheeler truck. The chickens and the dogs and the birds are greeting one another happily. Guess I have to get used to the idea that in this part of the world, 6-ish IS the time to rise and shine and that my almost 3-year old insomnia is officially over. The living room smells like detergent and fabric conditioner. Because laundry is hanging right in there. Don't even ask.

Doggone

It just occurred to me. That's prolly why I've been a dog lover since I was in diapers (although I ate my first pet... Hey! I was still in an age where my parents get to decide what to have for dinner or starve) because I'm .0001% dog. My apartment's tiles are white and it just hit me that my hair is ALWAYS all over the place.

Mega Lashes

I've always willed my eye-lashes to sprout out and multiply and I don't know why. I have this huge fixation for long lashes. I always stare at people who do, regardless of gender or the authenticity of the matter. Unfortunately, mine is short, non-voluminous and just plain sad. Or plain and sad.  I had to shrug off my dislike to lie still while somebody is fussing about something connected to my being and went to the salon to have extensions. I pulled them out a few days later. I can't cry when I'm drunk. I had to bathe delicately. I had to wash my face as if it's made of parchment.  It was really kind of a paralyzed-90-year-old way of living. No sunglasses, no eye-make up, no tossing and turning while sleeping. Unfortunately, when one is drunk, one has no control over one's sleeping movements. One day I woke up and the fakers were all topsy-turvy and not upward curvy. My eyes looked totally tousled and hairy and to think I only have half-an-eyebrow over each one.  Still, all the time I had those mega-watt peepers, I kept staring at myself. And loving what I see. Creepy. And I can't lie. I'm still completely vain about my lashes. Aside from the Maybelline Cat Eyes thingy, I'm also looking into growth serums and stick-ons. We'll see. 

The Mega Horn Effect

OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! He strides toward the men's room in a godly sort of way. He soo wanna make me do girlie stuff like bat my eyelashes, flick my hair, giggle and swoon and so on and so forth. And also jump on him, pinch his man-boobies or grab his buns. You know.

M is for... Monday! (yeah right!)

M is for monday, multi-tasking, monica and... hmmmmm...as Georgia Nicolson would say "mega-horn" and let's leave it at that. hahahhaha!

Multi-tasker at her finest. Referring to ME of course. Busily solving work-related problems while busily doing some online shoe-drooling-and-ogling with Monica. Those Jimmy F**ck-me Choos can buy me a 40-inch LCD TV. Hell, an iPhone costs far less. But maybe those shoes cost soo much because even if the stilettos are 50-feet high, one would feel that one is walking on a bunch of clouds rather than on rough asphalt? I wouldn't know, I'm just a Jimmy Choo/ Manolo Blahnik drooler.